Appreciation
We have just returned from a very brief dinner outing, 1 hour to be exact, I feel so bummed out about what I saw, it got me thinking.......
Sitting there in the crowded Pizza restaurant watching all the families go about their business, eating, chatting and having a seemingly good time in general I noticed one family in particular and just couldn't stop looking at them.... I noticed the teenage boy, I would say about 15 or 16 had been crying, obviously he had had an argument with mum because she looked at him and then turned her head(being a mum I know that look) , he came in after the rest of the family... I am sitting there looking at the mum not speaking, not making eye contact and the young boy with his head hanging low most likely very angry with mum, and I thought if only they both knew how lucky they were, how could she not speak to him, what if the last words they had said in the car were the last words they shared EVER? Then I thought wait a minute I too was one of those mums, how dare I think bad of her of course she wouldn't think anything of arguing with her son after all they probably do it every day,he is a teenager ... How sad it is that we don't realize what we have until its gone, that old saying is so true, I watched them and I felt very jealous, I thought to my self I would give anything to have my boys here and there is a mum not appreciating what she has, but that's just it isn't, I have said it before, we so take our kids for granted....... I pray that that mum never experiences the loss I have suffered, I hope that no parent would have to sit in a resturant feeling so sad and lost, I actually felt like I couldn't breath, I really wanted to say something to her but what would be the point, if someone had said to me 1 year and 2 weeks ago, go easy on the kids you never know what might happen I would have dismissed it after all we never think it could happen to us....
So here I sit again writing as an outlet when all I really want to do is scream, someone said to me the other day, "you seem in really good spirits this week" if only they knew, this rollercoaster of emotions, it SUX!!!! If it sounds like I am feeling sorry for myself, I am, tonight I am, but I think sometimes I have the right to feel that way afterall I am experiencing what no parent should.
Sitting there in the crowded Pizza restaurant watching all the families go about their business, eating, chatting and having a seemingly good time in general I noticed one family in particular and just couldn't stop looking at them.... I noticed the teenage boy, I would say about 15 or 16 had been crying, obviously he had had an argument with mum because she looked at him and then turned her head(being a mum I know that look) , he came in after the rest of the family... I am sitting there looking at the mum not speaking, not making eye contact and the young boy with his head hanging low most likely very angry with mum, and I thought if only they both knew how lucky they were, how could she not speak to him, what if the last words they had said in the car were the last words they shared EVER? Then I thought wait a minute I too was one of those mums, how dare I think bad of her of course she wouldn't think anything of arguing with her son after all they probably do it every day,he is a teenager ... How sad it is that we don't realize what we have until its gone, that old saying is so true, I watched them and I felt very jealous, I thought to my self I would give anything to have my boys here and there is a mum not appreciating what she has, but that's just it isn't, I have said it before, we so take our kids for granted....... I pray that that mum never experiences the loss I have suffered, I hope that no parent would have to sit in a resturant feeling so sad and lost, I actually felt like I couldn't breath, I really wanted to say something to her but what would be the point, if someone had said to me 1 year and 2 weeks ago, go easy on the kids you never know what might happen I would have dismissed it after all we never think it could happen to us....
So here I sit again writing as an outlet when all I really want to do is scream, someone said to me the other day, "you seem in really good spirits this week" if only they knew, this rollercoaster of emotions, it SUX!!!! If it sounds like I am feeling sorry for myself, I am, tonight I am, but I think sometimes I have the right to feel that way afterall I am experiencing what no parent should.
posted by Michelle @ 7:15 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home